20130119

Too much sharing


I have a problem, I think everyone has this problem, at least a bit. All because of social media. We get excited, jadi ketagih. The instantaneous blurbs and immediate response makes us blunt, and slowly kita lupa untuk berfikir dulu sebelum post apa-apa. Kita pikir pon dalam jangka masa pendek, dan tidak menghiraukan kesan jangka masa panjang. 

Facebook, Twitter, Blogging. Semua ni platform yang best, tapi boleh membawa kemudaratan. Sometimes, benda yang kita luahkan disalahertikan. Ada pulak, hal yang kita cerita semata hendak berkongsi, akan digunakan against kita suatu masa nanti. Contohnya bagi yang belum berkahwin, kita duk cerita, post gambar time ngedet segala, bercinta bagai nak rak, skali last-last break. Haru jugaklah nak delete atau draft post, kalau dah tak larat, private atau delete terus blog. Tapi, dah dihebahkan pon kisahnya, jadi mesti ada yang baca, dan ingat.. dan mulalah menjadi barang gossip orang. Because people just love to gossip.

Sometimes, macam Anna, suka kongsi perihal konflik kehidupan, especially about my studies. Niat nak luah dan dengan harapan ada yang boleh dapat motivation dari para pembaca, some which actually does help. Tapi, akan ada pula manusia kat luar sana, yang gunakan konflik ini, dan jadikan isu untuk jatuhkan or malukan kita, or maybe if something bad happens, depa akan kata "Hmm memang padan jadi macam tu.." 

In another situation, kadang-kadang kita post luahan hati kita, tapi kita tak cerita the details. Contohnya, "Sedihnya aku jadi macam ni".. and this will start to make people think, "Dia ni sedih pasepa?" Dan timbullah andaian, oooh mungkin dia break ngan kekasih dia, mungkin dia kena hidap penyakit, mungkin dia muflis.. etc.. Atau, "Weh bencinya aku kat dia.." lepas tu mulalah ada yang terasa, atau mula nak investigate, sapalah dia benci ni. Busybody la katakan. 

And because it's the internet, stuff whether true or not, spreads extremely fast. So fast that, by the time nak betulkan keadaan, it gets extremely complicated and in the end jadi stress. 

Dan benda ni bukan internet je lah. Even among circle of people/friends. Kita kongsi cerita. Kita nak minta nasihat. Share masalah.. and because we are humans, the possibility of that person nak berkongsi pulak dengan orang lain tu memang akan ada. It's a natural inclination. Kekadang tak sengaja, tercerita, lagi-lagi kalau duk tengah borak tu, situation sama dengan kisah kawan punya masalah. Yang susahnya pulak, kekadang cerita yang diceritakan balik tu tak berapa nak accurate, kalau benda positif takpa, kalau negatif, tak ke naya?

Jadi, tu yang pernah terbaca.. kalau ada masalah ke, apa-apa baik simpan sendiri. Kalau nak merintih, merintih lah pada Allah.. apa silap kita buat, dosa ka apa, toksah duk cerita kat orang. Yelah, memang lah kita ni hidup di kalangan orang, dan memerlukan juga kawan untuk bercerita, dan dengan harapan hilang sket masalah tu, atau dapat nasihat yang bagus, cuma, kita kena betul-betul berhati-hati dengan sapa kita cerita. Tapi tulah, bila dah terlalu beremosi ni, sukar nak simpan, rasa nak luahkan itu membuak-buak. Jadi berpada-padalah, dan cuba tahan diri dari terlalu nak berkongsi dengan orang lain. 

Some things should remain a secret. Biarlah hanya Tuhan yang tahu. 

{ANNA}

20130109

It's another year...

The past year, has a been tough. And it's still tough. And I am battling the hugest conflict in my life. I don't blame anyone else, perhaps a little, but mainly it's my fault. Looking back at my past, at my behavior, at my attitude, something like this was bound to happen. I'm not surprised at all.

Never in a million years, I thought this would happen to me. But they always say, never say never. I have always, always been one who sees the cup half full, at least I try to. But as of late, its getting harder and harder to do. 

Benar, segala apa yang terjadi ada hikmahNya. Mana yang baik datang dariNya, mana yang buruk,  dari kita sendiri. Everyone has their own problems and issues, it's how we face it, it's how we view things, it's our own mindset. But it's so hard to keep a positive mindset and it's tiring. What makes things more complicated is that now, I have to think about my son as well. So tak boleh nak selfish dengan masalah sendiri. But hey, I guess that's life. It's not only about yourself, but the people around you as well. 

However, to make others happy, we have to make ourselves happy first. Right? Or do we make others happy first, to make ourselves happy? I guess it's a two way game. Ini masalahnya bila kita terlalu bergantung pada orang lain untuk bahagia. We begin to expect rather than to accept. And when things don't go as planned, everything goes down. Our hopes, our motivation, our confidence, our happiness. 

Hidup di dunia ni sangat mencabar. It's so easy to get lost. Walaupun kita tau ia sementara, kita masih lalai, sibuk dengan dunia, forgetting that it's gonna end, and we've wasted it being sad, being troubled, when we should really be preparing ourselves for our permanent life in the hereafter. {ANNA}



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